good, al-Hamdu liLlah.

al-Hamdu liLlah, I'm positive I can use google for educators what a cool tool, al-Hamdu liLlah.

...

Now for a Random thought:

I was thinking about the Qur'an, how Allah has mercy on the reader. I noticed that, let's say you read about Allah's punishment, soon after, you will read about His Mercy. There's a pattern, imagine a heart feeling fear, regret, and then, reminded that Allah is not only severe in punishment but that He is Merciful to His devout believers.

I wait for it, a verse with ease. It's a hardship to read about Allah's severe punishment, it's a burden on the heart, a pressure. Then I wait, patiently for a following verse that I am confident will come "soon" that will speak about the believer, that will ease this burden, that will phase out the hardship in my heart. And always, it's there, waiting for me, as I wait for it, telling me about a garden of pleasures.

Then with this feeling of intense hope, desire for this final abode, I know that I am not there, and then longing remains. It is a longing to be in a place where I am secure with the fact that Allah is pleased with me.

What is this dunya really? Why then that we chase after things that will not last? Everything goes away, everything, except our good deeds. Imagine, we may chase after knowledge, but what keeps us company in our graves is our good deeds, so what then is knowledge without good actions? subHan Allah.

I want though, success in this dunya as well as in the hereafter. Allah is capable of all things, so why not ask for success in both worlds? Allah is the Merciful, and Allah does as He wills.

Allah knows what moves the heart of man, what words we need for comfort, what words we need to be aware of His wrath, it's all so perfect.

So with life, times are hard, but there's no doubt that if these hard times are taken with good spirit and self-control that good will come from it, in sha' Allah.

Patience increases with time, and proper discipline.

For instance, with my class, one very important, important, important, quality to teach children is patience. I realized, patiece is easier to have when you feel there is a solution to your problem. What I mean for this is, if you feel that you have a hopeless end, it's hard to be patient. I told my students, if I do not call on you, please, write a note and put it in my mailbox and let me know that I'm being un-fair... [I always read my mail to the class at the end of the day, and I assure them that I will do my best to pick the person who wrote note]. With the personal note from the student, I make a personal effort to attend to her or his needs. So I imagine du`a' to be that way, that when we make a personal note to Allah, that Allah makes it personal to aid us with our difficulty.

The re-assurance that things are going to be okay, helps with patience. Like for example, in my life, there are people I can assure that my trust will not be broken with them, and if they need patience perhaps that may aid them in comfort.

I will admit though, that even when we know that there is potential for great good, it's the longing that drains a persons being. For example, longing for the pleasure of Allah, to be in Paradise, that at times does create a need for patience, because the desire for Jannah, is so immense. I want so badly for my life to end if it is true I will be admitted to Jannah, if Allah is to have Mercy on me, and to forgive me... I don't want this world if I could have that. subHan Allah, what's strange is that, although I may not want this world when it is in comparison to the hereafter, while I am living on this dunya, I still desire and want success while I am here.

Khayr, with Allah it's all khayr, it really is. The sinner is the one who oppresses their own soul, Allah only wills good, al-Hamdu liLlah.

Random other thought:

I was watching TV with my dad and they had a special where they were showing the prophet Muhammad's (salla Allahu `alayhi wa sallam's) belongings, it was amazing. subHan Allah, if that is really his stuff, I would love to be near it, just so that perhaps I may have some vision of the prophet (salla Allahu `alayhi wa sallam) perhaps imagining him wearing that particular shirt, or holding that sword... subHan Allah. Click here to see.

ya Allah.

In more news:

My dad has a very interesting way with people, just yesterday an older lady that he has befriended was guided by Allah to Islam, and Allah used my dad as a tool for her guidance... Barak Allahu fi. This is not the first person my dad was given the priviledge and the honor to aid towards Islam, my dad has al-Hamdu liLlah been used as a tool for the guidance of many.

ya Allah how I love my father, and may Allah preserve him for me. amin. Also, in sha' Allah if anyone reads this blog, make du`a' for me and for my family.

Random thought:

I have never been so "un-lazy" in my life. With this class I teach, I grade things right away, I discuss things with parents right away, I clean the class right away... I learned that if things are not done right away, they pile up, and it's a HUGE burden, but if things are taken care of right away, and that when I am constantly "doing" things, things get "done" and it's not burdensome, and I am at ease. Now, al-Hamdu liLlah when I am given a task, I'm on it like a hawk.

My personality has changed for the better from just a month of teaching. I learned to be firm, I learned to not procrastinate, I learned to speak with authority, I never knew how to do that. I can get my class quiet, ready to do work, and to clean their work area in very little time. I just ring a bell and they race to be ready. By Allah I love my class in a way I can never fully explain, and I feel it is because every time I enter, I enter with a du`a', and Allah does answer our good du`a'... always.

...

al-Hamdu liLlah for everything, and I hope that everyone out there who has things to study and prepare for that they study and prepare with ease and barakah, and that every matter in their lives that has khayr in it, that Allah makes a way for it, and gives them success in it, amin.